


At Home

by all_stories



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gender Dysphoria, Hurt/Comfort, Minor Injuries, Non-Binary Doctor (Doctor Who), do not bind with ace bandages!!!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-17
Updated: 2020-02-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:54:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22779022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/all_stories/pseuds/all_stories
Summary: tw: mentions of gender dysphoria, discomfort with pronouns, binding etcDo not bind with ace bandages! They are very dangerous!This face just didn't feel right to her. Yes, she's always been a man, and yes, being a woman could be considered an upgrade by some, but it just doesn't fit. Time Lords don't consider gender the way humans do, but when you spend so long around them it can be hard not to assimilate a few ideas.I feel like 13 doesn't talk about gender enough! So they do in this!
Comments: 5
Kudos: 66





	At Home

**Author's Note:**

> This was really self-indulgent but the idea came to me so here we are

This face just didn't feel right to her. Yes, she's always been a man, and yes, being a woman could be considered an upgrade by some, but it just doesn't fit. Time Lords don't consider gender the way humans do, but when you spend so long around them it can be hard not to assimilate a few ideas.

"Hey Doc, where we going today?" Graham asked, walking into the console room with the rest of the fam. The Doctor had stopped moving, but resumed once she realized she wasn't alone anymore.

"Wherever-and whenever-you want, she's a time machine after all! You choose, Graham," the Doctor said, quickly circling the console to face him. 

"Somewhere calm, preferably. I'm not as young as you lot anymore." Graham laughed.

"Honestly, how many times can I tell you. I'm like, billions of years old technically," the Doctor said, exasperated.

Leaving her to pilot the ship, Graham turned to Yaz and Ryan. "She definitely hasn't told us that before, right?"

Yaz shook her head. "Don't think so, but she is an alien and has mentioned being other people."

"Yeah, it's not that surprising really, all things considered," Ryan added.

After some shaking and a small thud, the Doctor gestured to the doors. "Here we are fam, let's go and have a look!"

"Doctor, where are we?" Yaz asked.

"No idea, but let's find out!" she responded, setting off into the unknown. 

Team TARDIS finds themselves in what appears to be a military compound, around midday. The four buildings are relatively close together and similar in size. There is a tall chain-link fence surrounding the grounds, outside of which is a massive forest. The Doctor scans their surroundings with the sonic screwdriver and looks at the reading. "Atmosphere is breathable, very Earth-like, but planet is unknown. Huh, interesting, lots of life signs but no one around." She scrunched her face in thought.

"But how can that be? If it says there's something here, where is everyone?" Ryan asked.

"Excellent question, 10 points to Ryan! But to answer, I don't know. Yaz, Ryan, you two look in the buildings on the left, Graham and I will take the right. Meet back here in thirty minutes," the Doctor instructed. The group split up and the Doctor set a brisk pace for Graham to keep up with. 

The interior of all the buildings were the same. A small entryway with two halls leading off to either side. Graham flicked the light switch where he and the Doctor went in first, nothing happened. "Hey Doc, looks like the electricity's out."

"Nothing to worry about Graham, there's plenty of light coming in from outside." The Doctor turned back around to face him. "Superior biology, I have-" she stopped, casting her eyes down behind Graham. 

"Doc? What is it?"

"Don't. Move." She scanned across Graham and the rest of the building. "Stupid! Stupid Doctor! You idiot!" She cursed for another moment in a language Graham couldn't understand. 

"What!? What is it?" Graham asked, getting more panicked by the second.

"Don't turn around. Just... back out of the door. Slowly!"

Graham did as he was told, and left the building. "Doctor. Tell me what's happening!"

"I have to warn the others. Stay here, don't move!" The Doctor sprinted over to where Yaz and Ryan went, briefly noticing there was a fifth building hidden behind the others.

"Yaz! Ryan! Outside now!" She yelled. The two of them came out of the first building. 

"What's wrong?" Yaz asked. She and Ryan looked past the Doctor to see Graham standing where he was told to stay.

"Granddad!" Ryan started towards Graham, but the Doctor's hand on his shoulder stopped him. 

"Ryan, you can't touch him, don't even let your shadows cross," She said. Ryan pushed her hand off and went over to Graham, Yaz and the Doctor following behind.

"Did the Doc tell you what's happening?" Graham asked.

"No she just said to keep away."

"Graham, you have a sandwich on you? Slowly, toss it here," the Doctor held her hands out. Graham did so, and questioning look on his face. "Ryan, Yaz, follow me." The Doctor walked over to the building they were exploring before. "Watch the shadow in the corner." She tossed Graham's sandwich and sighed when it vanished in seconds.

"Doctor..." Yaz started.

"Graham, I'm so sorry. You've got two shadows. One of them is something called the Vashta Nerada. I need... no it's too late." The Doctor paused in thought, holding up a hand to stall the onslaught of questions from the fam. "There's something I can try, it won't be pleasant but it might save you."

"Do it, Doc. I trust you," Graham said instantly.

"I'm so sorry." She reached out and placed a hand on his face. From Yaz and Ryan's perspective, they saw Graham fall to the ground. "He's fine, just unconscious. We need to act fast, follow me and I'll explain later."

The Doctor ran at full speed to the fifth building, Ryan and Yaz following behind. When they caught up, Ryan and Yaz shared a glance. The Doctor was breathing heavily, something they had never seen from them even after running for a long time.

"Doctor are you okay? You're breathing too hard after running such a small distance," Yaz said, worried.

"And what was that with Graham? How could you just leave him?" Ryan added.

The Doctor unlocked the door with her sonic, not stopping to answer their questions. Once inside, the Doctor went around opening all the windows as wide as possible. "We need light, there's something here they want, we just have to find it. So far, there hasn't been anything, it's probably a book hidden somewhere."

"A book? Why would that matter? Doctor!" Yaz exclaimed. At the scared tone of her voice the Doctor finally turned around.

"Yes? Everything's fine, don't worry about me! I'm the King of Okay. We return the book to the Vashta Nerada, they release Graham, we leave. Problem solved!" The Doctor says, quicker than usual.

It doesn't take long for them to find a hidden safe in the wall and open it, revealing an ordinary, unlabeled hardcover book. The Doctor immediately goes rushing off again back to where they left Graham. 

"C'mon then! Here's what you want!" She says, tossing the book into the middle of the complex. Shortly after, Graham's second shadow moves towards the book. "Ryan, help me," the Doctor asks, picking up Graham.

They manage to get him into the TARDIS med bay, the Doctor hooking up various wires and monitors. "He's fine, look," she says.

"He is, but you're clearly not, Doctor. You still haven't caught your breath after running, I'm worried," Yaz said. For a moment, there's no sound other than the Doctor's ragged breathing. Then, nothing.

"Look, it's fine, see?" The Doctor says. Ryan and Yaz fall silent again, and there's no sound coming from the Doctor. After a short period of time, she lets out a long sigh and starts breathing even harder than before.

"Doctor! Were you holding your breath? Why??" Yaz said, going to pick up what looked like a futuristic stethoscope and holding to the Doctor's chest. She could easily tell what was wrong, "Ryan, can you give us a minute?" Yaz asked quietly. He nodded and left the room.

"Doctor."

"Yaz... I"

"No, listen. Do you know how incredibly dangerous using an Ace bandage like this is?" 

The Doctor looked down, running a hand through her hair before answering. "No, well, yes, I soon realized."

"Doctor you have to take it off I-"

"Yaz. Don't ask me to do that, I can't it's too... I just, I can't."

"It's alright, I'm here, you're safe." Yaz reached under her shirts, ready to stop at any indication from the Doctor. She only nodded, looking away. Yaz removed the bandage, placing it to the side. "There are safer ways to do this, especially with your active lifestyle. I can help you if you just talk to me."

The Doctor paused slightly before confiding in her friend. "Time lords don't do genders and binaries like humans. I've spent so long around all of you I couldn't help but pick up on your ideas and ridiculous notions. I was a man all my life and now I'm, well, not. And it scares me. I don't feel comfortable this time around. Maybe that's just me thinking too much like a human. Sometimes it's fine and I hardly notice, but others? I can't stand looking at or feeling my own body."

"Doctor that's okay, I understand. Let's start wit something easy then, do you like when we use she/her pronouns when referring to you?"

"No. Maybe. Sometimes, I don't know. It's just... weird and different."

"Alright, we can default to they/them, but do you feel comfortable enough to tell us what you feel like using each day?"

"I- Yes, of course. We're a fam after all. I quite like the sound of that."

Largely unnoticed, Graham had left sometime during this conversation, leaving Yaz free to guide the Doctor into the bed he had been on. "Doctor, how long have you been doing this? It's possible you have a broken rib, which would explain your trouble breathing."

The Doctor conceded and hesitantly took off her coat before laying in the bed. "Probably too long. Actually, definitely too long."

"Is it alright if I have a look? I have some first aid training, I want to make sure you're fine." Hesitantly, the Doctor nods. Yaz lifts up the Doctor's shirts, revealing a pattern of bruising, some clearly newer than others. Yaz winces in sympathy just looking at them. "Let me know if anything hurts too much," Yaz says, as she begins to feel the Doctor's ribs. Yaz does her best to finish as quickly as possible, and finds nothing terribly wrong aside from the extensive bruising. She lowers the Doctor's shirts and helps her sit up again. "I think you're alright, but you have to let the bruises heal completely."

"Thank you, Yaz."

"Of course, Doctor. We're all here for you. Now, once you're healed we can get find you a proper binder."

The Doctor smiles at her. For the first time in this body, they truly feel at home.

**Author's Note:**

> DO NOT BIND WITH ACE BANDAGES


End file.
